Sunday, November 21, 2010
Betrayal...
“One man betrayed with a kiss…In the name of love…” ~ Bono
Betrayal
A word
A turning away
A cold and slow withdrawal of life
A wound that leaves a scar
A recalcitrance to love what once was loved
A leaving behind
A lie
Betrayal
Alone
Lost
Empty
Doubt
Suspicion Pain
Horror
Betrayal
A deception
A cloaking of reality
A game
A shedding of tears
A shedding of tears
A breaking of a heart
A death of something inside
A lamenting grieving for what once was
A death of something inside
A lamenting grieving for what once was
Betrayal
My Place Today...
My apartment in Two Harbors. Getting ready for Bar Church on a snowy Sunday morning.
Saturday, November 20, 2010
Expectations and "Poetic Memories"
Maybe the expectations people have are a form of judgment…?We place or impose our projections or pre-suppositions on others and in doing so we judge either overtly or latently by expecting something whether it is even ever known or spoken. In this way we, without doubt are invariably disappointed because no one can ever live up to our projections and it is also selfish and hurtful because the one who is being projected upon cannot, nor does not know all of the expectations that are being heaped on them. Thinking about myself and my life, I believe that I do this a lot and am becoming more aware of it.
When living by the expectations we place on others or that others have placed on us we become trapped in the past by failed or unrealized expectations or in the 
future by expected expectations that are usually very rarely expressed.
future by expected expectations that are usually very rarely expressed. These expectations are constructed in our mind to create someone else in our image. All this precludes letting someone be who they are and loving them for who they are. Not only does it constrain someone from being themselves, it also steals the “now” from them; the real, concrete moments of our existence that make life beautiful. When we refuse to be in the present moments of time which are all that are really real we allow the poignancy and profoundness of each mystical moment to slip away.
We abandon or ruin something by not attending to the “now” and the possibilities of what are “poetic memories” which are what “records everything that charms or touches us, that makes our lives beautiful” – to be created and then later cherished. It is these “poetic memories” that are authentic and that imprint so powerfully on our hearts as they embellish and confirm the relevance and significance of our individual stories and shared life stories as human beings.
Our relationships manifest our need for love and meaning and our very real desire or craving for each other and honest human touch. Touch not only of skin on skin, but mind on mind and heart on heart…being on being.
So…can we live a life without expectations? Be with each other without expectations? Be who we are and accept each other as simply who we are? I have to think and believe that this is possible and desirable but yet may not be the easiest thing.Yet, if attempted or risked, it is what will make for real life and real friendship?
To live a life in the present moments of each day is to live without expectations or judgments. It is how life is made beautiful and authentic friendship is possible and "poetic memories" created.
Eyes...
Eyes
Tell a million varied stories
We look to them for signs
For answers
To unspoken questions
They pierce
They avoid
They desire
They deceive
They speak
When there are no wordsExpressing the truth of life and living
Vibrant and vacant
In the space between breaths
Where secrets are hidden
Yearning to be known by another
To be naked, bathed in the light of knowing
EyesFriday, November 19, 2010
Words...
Words...
Fall like tears,
Drenching the ground,
And the page,
Bleed...
Eyes turn red,
The earth swells,
The heart collapses,
Exhausted...
Dryness,
Eyes and dirt,
Emptiness,
Lonliness,
Lost...
Crimson stained,
Words...
Fall like tears,
Drenching the ground,
And the page,
Bleed...
Eyes turn red,
The earth swells,
The heart collapses,
Exhausted...
Dryness,
Eyes and dirt,
Emptiness,
Lonliness,
Lost...
Crimson stained,
Words...
Darkness...
Darkness,
That which we all have,
Inside.
Some bury it deep,
Some wear it like a smile,
Some pretend it is light.
Some disguise it,
Some dispise it.
But others...
Transform it,
Turn it,
Redemn it,
Flaunt it,
In the light.
Those whom illuminate it,
Die to it,
And are free, from the,
Darkness
That which we all have,
Inside.
Some bury it deep,
Some wear it like a smile,
Some pretend it is light.
Some disguise it,
Some dispise it.
But others...
Transform it,
Turn it,
Redemn it,
Flaunt it,
In the light.
Those whom illuminate it,
Die to it,
And are free, from the,
Darkness
Thursday, November 18, 2010
Tuesday, November 16, 2010
The Conversation...Derek Webb - What Matters More?
You say you always treat people like you like to be
I guess you love being hated for your sexuality
You love when people put words in your mouth
'Bout what you believe, make you sound like a freak
'Cause if you really believe what you say you believe
You wouldn't be so damn reckless with the words you speak
Wouldn't silently conceal when the liars speak
Denyin' all the dyin' of the remedy
Tell me, brother, what matters more to you?
Tell me, sister, what matters more to you?
If I can tell what's in your heart by what comes out of your mouth
Then it sure looks to me like being straight is all it's about
It looks like being hated for all the wrong things
Like chasin' the wind while the pendulum swings
'Cause we can talk and debate until we're blue in the face
About the language and tradition that he's comin' to save
Meanwhile we sit just like we don't give a shit
About 50,000 people who are dyin' today
Tell me, brother, what matters more to you?
Tell me, sister, what matters more to you?
The Converstion...Queen & David Bowie - Under Pressure...
"...It's the terror of knowing what this world is about
Watching some good friends screaming, "Let me out"
Pray tomorrow, gets me higher and higher and high
Pressure on people, people on streets
Turned away from it all like a blind man
Sat on a fence but it don't work
Keep coming up with love but it's so slashed and torn
Why, why, why?
Love
Insanity laughs under pressure, we're cracking
Can't we give ourselves one more chance?
Why can't we give love that one more chance?
Why can't we give love, give love, give love, give love, give love, give love, give love, give love?
'Cos love's such an old fashioned word
And love dares you to care for the people on the edge of the night
And love dares you to change our way of caring about ourselves
This is our last dance..."
Monday, November 15, 2010
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