We crossed the line, who pushed who over?
It doesn't matter to you, it matters to me.
We're cut adrift, but still floating.
I'm only hanging on to watch you go down, my love.
I disappeared in you
You disappeared from me.
I gave you everything you ever wanted
It wasn't what you wanted.
The men who love you, you hate the most
They pass right through you like a ghost.
They look for you, but your spirit is in the air.
Baby, you're nowhere.
Oh, love, you say in love there are no rules.
Oh, love, sweet-heart, you're so cruel.
Desperation is a tender trap
It gets you every time.
You put your lips to her lips
To stop the lie.
Her skin is pale like God's only dove
Screams like an angel for your love
Then she makes you watch her from above
And you need her like a drug.
Oh, love, you say in love there are no rules.
Oh, love, sweet-heart, you're so cruel.
She wears my love like a see-through dress
Her lips say one thing, her movements something else.
Oh, love, like a screaming flower
Love dying every hour.
Ah, you don't know if it's fear or desire,
Danger the drug that takes you higher?
Head of heaven, fingers in the mire
Her heart is racing you can't keep up.
The night is bleeding like a cut
Between the horses of love and lust we are trampled underfoot.
Oh, love, to stay with you I'd be a fool.
Oh, sweetheart, you're so cruel.
~ Ernest Hemingway, A Farewell To Arms
Saturday, March 26, 2011
So Cruel...(by U2)
Kay...
Muse, lover, friend,
Whisperer of longed for words,
Of ethereal comfort,
Fleeting moments of hope,
Barraged by loathing because, “I can't believe what you say
No, I can't believe what you say…”
Why?
The perpetual question,
I am tired,
Broken,
Alone.
Beauty surrounds me,
Humanity swirls,
And I am fading.
Falling now,
Weighted with doubt and confusion.
Kay…
Now but a shade,
A glimmer of love,
Hidden from reality,
Do you ever think of me?
You are nowhere to be found,
And I remain lost,
Haunted by dreams,
Disturbed in the night,
Distracted in the day,
By blue eyes I love.
Kay…
“I don't wanna be just another useless memory holding you tight,
Or just some other ghost out on the street to whom you stop and politely speak when you pass on by vanishing into the night…”
I am frightened now,
By your eyes I no longer see.
I am severed from my mooring,
Dislodged from,
My being,
My home,
My life,
My desire,
My earthly comfort.
Separated from your body I once slept by,
From familiar smells,
Your skin,
Your touch,
Your kiss,
All shattered,
All smashed,
All gone,
And,“I don't wanna fade away
Tell me what can I do what can I say
Cause darlin' I don't wanna fade away…”
Kay…
Remember, “Some got to win, some got to lose” from long ago?
Well, I understand winning and I understand losing but not how to stop loving you.
Kay...
Soho...
Night in Europe,
Humanity all about,
Masses of image bearers,
Meeting and not meeting.
Looking for another,
Another like them…lost and longing,
Someone to touch, to hold,
An almost desperate need for connection,
Voids to be filled,
Spaces to be explored,
Humans, raw and real,
Earthly desire mixed with created madness,
Dirt with dirt,
Dust with dust.
Wednesday, March 23, 2011
Free...
~ written while in Oxford 2011.
Free
From the fear of living,
To be alive,
To breath,
To run,
To live.
Freedom, not merely, “Just another word for nothing left to lose.”1
But, what allows us to lose and not care about losing.
“A bruised reed he will not break, and a smoldering wick he will not snuff out…”2
Failure is not to be feared, but embraced.
Only by embracing failure are we free from it.
Then grace breaks through to dance in the midst of failure.
“Fear not.”3
Fear is an imposter, a thief.
“…your joy will be complete."4
Pain, suffering and tears are but the passage ways for joy.
Hold onto them like the hand of a dear old friend.
Love then can speak through them like a hand held comforts a tired soul.
Then you can be,
Free
End Notes:
1 Kris Kristofferson, lyric from Me and Bobbi McGee
2 Matthew 12:20a TNIV
3 Luke 12:7 ESV
4 John 16:24b TNIV
Monday, March 21, 2011
Fr. Richard Rohr: Life on the Edge: Understanding the Prophetic Position
Read more here: Fr. Richard Rohr: Life on the Edge: Understanding the Prophetic Position
Rob Bell Reviews | Jesus Creed - and some of my thoughts and questions.
Rob Bell Reviews Jesus Creed
Interestingly, I have been travelling and as I have travelled (been in Australia for the last two weeks and now in London) I have been looking for any commentary on Rob Bell and his book or even copies of his book in book stores I have passed by. Granted, his book may not have been released in the places I have been, haven't checked on that. Also, I have not been exhaustive by any means in checking in book stores or media outlets - my explorations have been cursory at best.
Still, I have to wonder how isolated a story is this; in particular to America and the Evangelical community?
And, if the answer is yes, that this is a very parochial story and brouhaha then how does that then compare to the global though regional gospel imperative?
Saturday, March 19, 2011
The Ache and The Truth...
The thing is you can’t get out of your skin; there is no escape from what you are.
Contentment for me is so damn elusive and whether or not it exists is something that I question. Brutal honesty is what I want, even when I don’t particularly like what the honesty may mean. But, how can I hope to be honest and transparent if I do not afford others the same space to be honest - to be equally honest?
I have and still do live with so many delusions, contradictions, false selves and mutated identities. And even though I am much more aware of all this and the increasing self-reverential nature of my writing I find for some reason or for no reason that I continue to have a most difficult time of allowing myself to live life. I write and talk about living life and I am quite good at doing those two things but I fail at living life often and with ease. Are you still a hypocrite if you acknowledge your hypocrisy?
Nothing takes away what I have called the ache. The ache is whatever it is that haunts or breaks or fills you with guilt or shame, the demons of one’s life, everyone has an ache. The ache is common to all but the type of ache is specific to each.
The progressive realization that the ache increases and decrease from time to time and now and then but does not ever completely dissipate completely away – at least not in this life is part of the answer to life. The ache does not leave and those that say it has have been deceived or have deceived themselves either because of an oversimplification of life or delusion. Also, fear of doing the hard work of doing what the oracle at Delphi admonished, “To know thyself” or to live the examined life that Plato spoke about as, “The unexamined life” not being worth living, or Jesus who claimed, “The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy; I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full.”
It is a bit frustrating to hear so many (well intentioned, I am sure) people say, “the Lord will do this or Lord will do that” or “Jesus will do this or that.” It is not that I do not believe that Jesus is perfectly capable of doing “this or that” but unfortunately I do not believe he is about being some sort of divine, metaphysical magician. Jesus is with us, in the midst of life, with each of us, with each of our aches.
He doesn’t remove the ache. He bears it with us and we come to trust and intimately know him by his presence within the ache. The grace of Christ then does become sufficient regardless of anything. The Apostle Paul asked three times for his ache to be taken and the answer he received was “no.”
Do we really believe that life would be all that different for any of us?
So, contentment as elusive as it is, it is not dependant of the elimination of the ache but acceptance of the truth that the ache is common to all and Jesus incarnates within our lives, within our aches.
In knowing this, there can be fleeting contentment and moments of joy. And, relationships and community with honesty and transparency as there hallmarks can bear “one another’s burdens” or aches as the more we love and share with each other the more we help and come more fully to know that indeed we are not alone with whatever our ache may be.
Friday, March 18, 2011
King’s Cross 7 | Jesus Creed: What does “unclean” mean? How do you teach the purity laws for today? Do they “symbolize”? What?
Read More here:
King’s Cross 7 Jesus Creed
Thursday, March 17, 2011
Greg Boyd: An Ancient Philosophical Mistake In The Debate About Open Theism
“First, Plato argued that we see not by light entering our eyes (as we now know is the case) but by light proceeding out of our eyes (Timaeus 45b). For Plato, seeing is an active, not a passive, process. Since knowledge was considered to be a kind of seeing, Plato also construed knowing as acting on something rather than being acted upon (Sophist 248-49). I’ve discovered that this mistaken view of seeing and knowing is picked up and defended by a host of Hellenistic philosophers. (As an aside, Jesus seems to have capitalized on this mistaken view of eyesight to illustrate a point [Mt 6:22; Lk 11:34]).”
Read More Here:
An Ancient Philosophical Mistake In The Debate About Open Theism » Blog » Greg Boyd (Christus Victor Ministries)
Bewitched...
~ A comment from someone on my blog.
Bewitched,
Betrayed & broken.
Being & becoming.
Believing & belonging.
Bewildered & blind.
Bouncing & banging.
Bleakness & bliss.
Breakers & bands.
Becks & Bass.
Beach & backyard.
Blonde & brunette.
Balls & backs.
Brown & brazen.
Bare & beseeching.
Blushing & begging.
Bedded & beloved.
Browsed & battered.
Bane & boredom.
Beauty & bohemian.
Bathsheba & Bethlehem.
Banquet & blessing.
Breathless & blessed.
Blazoned & blackened.
Brood & bruised.
Behind & before.
Besmirching & blaspheming.
Bedeviled & bemoaned.
Balance and beginning.
Burdened & bright.
Betrayed & broken.
The Matrix..."Simulacra & Simulation"
"The publication in France of Simulacra et Simulation in 1981 marked Jean Baudrillard's first important step toward theorizing the postmodern. Moving away from Marxist/Freudian approaches that had concearned him earlier, Baudrillard developed in this bbok a theory of contempory culture that relies on displacing economic notions of cultural production with notions of cultural expenditure.
Baudrillard, uses concepts of the simulcram - the copy without an original - and simulation, crucial to an understanding of the postmodern, to address the concept of mass reproduction and reproducibility that characterizes our electronic media culture."
I do not believe that it was either accident or coinceidence that the creators of the Matrix movies, the Wachowski brothers palced this book in the begining of the movie where Neo is asked to "wake up" and to follow the "white rabbit."
Watch the scene here:
Bruce Springsteen... On Identity and Love...Briliant Disguise...
"The self is a mysterious thing....love can't be explained, only experienced."
~ Bruce Springsteen
"I met her on the strip three years ago
In a Camaro with this dude from L.A.
I blew that Camaro off my back and drove that little girl away
But now there's wrinkles around my baby's eyes
And she cries herself to sleep at night
When I come home the house is dark
She sighs "Baby did you make it all right"
She sits on the porch of her daddy's house
But all her pretty dreams are torn
She stares off alone into the night
With the eyes of one who hates for just being born
For all the shut down strangers and hot rod angels
Rumbling through this promised land
Tonight my baby and me we're gonna ride to the sea
And wash these sins off our hands..."
~ Bruce Springsteen, lines from, Racing in the Street
Wednesday, March 16, 2011
My Cousin's Experience with the Tokyo Earthquake...
Read his whole story here:
9.0 - Random this, miscellaneous that, etc., etc.
Tuesday, March 15, 2011
The Journey...Paradise and Blue Eyes...
And look for a little fun
But I find a darkened corner
'Cause I still miss someone
Oh, no I never got over those blues eyes
I see them every where
I miss those arms that held me
When all the love was there..."
"I wonder if she's sorry
For leavin' what we'd begun
There's someone for me somewhere
And I still miss someone
Oh, no I never got over those blues eyes
I see them every where
I miss those arms that held me
When all the love was there ..."
Paradise…
The sun rises and sets,
Each day more beautiful than the last,
Hues of brilliance fill the sky.
The ocean glistens, bathed in sunlight,
All that is lost is found in its saltiness.
Soft warm breezes soothe my skin.
At night come the stars,
And the Southern Cross,
Then my thoughts go to a girl
A girl from long ago,
First kissed under different stars,
A long time ago,
Where innocence was lost,
And a new life created.
While we checked our pulses,
To prove that it was real and we were alive.
I miss that young girl’s smile,
Her radiant blue eyes,
The smell of her hair,
The way she made me feel…
“The world breaks every one and afterward many are strong at the broken places…”
And so it is also with Paradise,
And Innocence,
And Love,
We are broken and we ache to be strong again.
No matter how far I go,
How many miles away,
Her memory weighs me down.
Her beauty haunts me,
She is in my dreams,
None of her leaves me,
Even in,
Paradise…
The Journey...Xanadu & Some Random Thoughts....
I realized today that I will not be able to be in a relationship with anyone unless I am able to trust enough to tell all that there is about me, my life, and my whole story. And, then after hearing my story the one the story is told to will still like me, love me, accept me. At this point in my life I doubt this is possible.
As I sit here I do not know what the date is, I do not know what time it is and I do not care. I have no phone, no laptop while I sit here at a café in Fremantle and it is wonderful. Free from so many constraints and shackles that are a means of enslavement and control over my being.
Attempting at every turn to make me into a perpetual human doing, a cog in the mechanism of mere human existence rather than a human being infused with life and exuberance – alive to all the possibilities that being human can afford.
I have been struggling with what it is, what it means to actually be a Christian and more specifically an Evangelical?
As I am sitting in Fremantle and thinking about this, I have come to the conclusion, as fleeting as that conclusion may be – that the only way that I am o.k. with God is to remind myself that what I see 95% of the time with Christianity and the Evangelical camp is not at all what Jesus was or is.
Only after meditating on that notion am I better at being who I profess to be and not be, the endless bifurcation of my false and true self, my identity. I have to believe that Jesus loves and accepts me and that it is his affection, acceptance and love that I need and not some variation of what has become Christianity.
For it is him and only him that will sustain and create my true self, my identity – he says, “"Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light" (Matthew 11:28-30 TNIV).
The Journey...Southern Cross...Redux...
"So we cheated and we lied and we tested.
And we never failed to fail; it was the easiest thing to do.
You will survive being bested.
Somebody fine will come along make me forget about loving you
in the Southern Cross..."
"I have been around the world,
lookin' for that woman/girl
Who knows love can endure.
And you know it will.
And you know it will..."
Monday, March 14, 2011
The Journey...Catherine & The Brilliant Disguise....
struggling to do everything right
And then it all falls apart
when out go the lights
I'm just a lonely pilgrim
I walk this world in wealth
I want to know if it's you I don't trust
'cause I damn sure don't trust myself..."
"So tell me who I see
when I look in your eyes
Is that you baby
or just a brilliant disguise..."
Sunday, March 13, 2011
The Southern Cross....
"When you see the Southern Cross for the first time
You understand now why you came this way.
'Cause the truth you might be runnin' from is so small.
But it's as big as the promise - The promise of a comin' day.
So I'm sailing for tomorrow - My dreams are a dyin'.
And my love is an anchor tied to you - Tied with a silver chain..."
"I have been around the world,
lookin' for that woman/girl
Who knows love can endure.
And you know it will.
And you know it will.
So we cheated and we lied and we tested.
And we never failed to fail; it was the easiest thing to do.
You will survive being bested.
Somebody fine will come along make me forget about loving you
in the Southern Cross..."
Thursday, March 10, 2011
The Journey...Bruce Springsteen - Long Walk Home...
Trying to figure out what went wrong
You just slipped somethin' into my palm
Then you were gone
I could smell the same deep green of summer
Above me the same night sky was glowin'
In the distance I could see the town where I was born..."
Hey pretty Darling, don't wait up for me
Gonna be a long walk home
A long walk home..."
The Journey...Bruce Springsteen - Human Touch...
We let it all slip away
In the end what you don't surrender
Well the world just strips away..."
"So you've been broken and you've been hurt
Show me somebody who ain't
Yeah, I know I ain't nobody's bargain
But, hell, a little touchup
and a little paint...
You might need somethin' to hold on to
When all the answers, they don't amount to much
Somebody that you could just to talk to
And a little of that Human Touch "
Girl, ain't no kindness in the face of strangers
Ain't gonna find no miracles here
Well you can wait on your blesses my darlin'
But I got a deal for you right here
I ain't lookin' for praise or pity
I ain't comin' 'round searchin' for a crutch
I just want someone to talk to
And a little of that Human Touch
Just a little of that Human Touch
The Journey...
I'd find a way to believe that it's all true
Knowing that you lied straight-faced while I cried
Still I look to find a reason to believe..."
"Ever seen a blind man cross the road
tryna' to make the other side
Ever seen a young girl growing old
tryna' to make herself a bride
So what becomes of you my love
When they have finally stripped you of
The handbags and the gladrags
that your poor Grandad had to sweat so he could buy..."
Wednesday, March 9, 2011
Rev. Anne Howard: Mary Magdalene: A Heroine Of Biblical Proportions
Rev. Anne Howard: Mary Magdalene: A Heroine Of Biblical Proportions
The Journey...Morning in Perth...
Tuesday, March 8, 2011
Monday, March 7, 2011
Enjoyment of life...
Mars Hill - Pyro-theology
Mars Hill - Pyro-theology
Premature Monogamy - The Daily Dish | By Andrew Sullivan
Premature Monogamy - The Daily Dish By Andrew Sullivan
Love Wins? Rob Bell and Universalism...
First off, here is a link: http://www.gregboyd.org/blog/rob-bell-is-not-a-universalist-and-i-actually-read-love-wins/ to the blog post Greg Boyd wrote about Rob’s book and what is particularly good about it, is that Greg has actually read the book. He had received an advanced copy from the publisher.
Also, here is blog entry Greg wrote on “Baby Universalism” which is interesting in light of this whole topic: http://www.gregboyd.org/blog/baby-universalism-and-reasonable-infanticide/
Here is a preliminary sketch of my thoughts:
I doubt Greg’s comments will have little or any impact on the “new Calvinist” cohort led by John Piper and Mark Driscoll.
In my opinion this is simply another foray in the ongoing civil war within the evangelical community.
In an article I read about this on Tony Campolo’s blog (http://www.redletterchristians.org/love-wins-rob-bell-and-the-new-calvinists/) author Jarod McKenna wrote, “…apart from sexuality there are few hotter issues (no pun intended) that heaven and hell on the evangelical landscape.”
What struck me about this comment is that while this controversy was ongoing in the what I would describe as primarily the American Evangelical community I was in London. And, this past week in Soho at a predominately gay restaurant that my brother works at (my brother is gay). The evening that I was at the restaurant there was to be a drag show later on that night at a club named Jojo’s. So, in my mind as I was surrounded by drag queens, gays, transvestites and also some straight people the two issues of sexuality and heaven and hell were dancing about in my head. I must say the people in that restaurant were the most friendly and cordial people I had met and talked with while in London. No judgmental streak. Perhaps, that is why Jesus felt so at home with the tax collectors and prostitutes?
No one I talked with that night knew, nor cared that Rob Bell wrote a book that supposedly now made him a universalist in terms of soteriology. Nor, would they know what that meant or why someone named John Piper would Tweet “Farewell, Rob Bell.”
I have to agree with N.T. Wright and his summation of the current state of the understanding of heaven and hell and its muddied nature and all the confusion about it as he eloquently wrote about in his book “Surprised by Hope” – so I ask why then not have a conversation about it? As, Scot McKnight has commented his students are already having these discussions as are a great many who concern themselves with such things. All Rob has done is dare to speak about what everyone is already talking about, to confront one of the many things we as Christians must wrestle with.
Certainty not doubt is the real issue.
Which brings me back to the restaurant in Soho – if love does indeed win and we as Christians say we believe it did (at least in principle) on Calvary then everyone was worth the death of God. Perhaps, we are more afraid of losing power and control and our right to be right than we are at loving like Christ loved. Perhaps, we love to greatly the forbidden fruit of judgment and love less the prostitute and tax collectors of our day.
One last thought on all this, after a week of interesting experiences and people in London I woke up about a day or so ago with this text fresh on my mind, “After this I looked, and there before me was a great multitude that no one could count, from every nation, tribe, people and language, standing before the throne and in front of the Lamb. They were wearing white robes and were holding palm branches in their hands” (Rev 7:9 TNIV).
It was strange when I woke up this verse is what was in my head and the words “ great multitude” were blaring. If love did win on Calvary and love indeed will win then surely the multitude of the image bearers of God that will share in the hope of the gospel – the bodily resurrection will be great, both ontologically and existentially. And greater in scope “great multitude” than we can imagine for such is the nature of our Abba’s love.
Sunday, March 6, 2011
Saturday, March 5, 2011
Friday, March 4, 2011
Rich Mullins...
I've seen the world and I have known
So many secrets
I wish now I did not know
'Cause they have crept into my heart
They have left it cold and dark
And bleeding
Bleeding and falling apart..."
Leo Tolstoy...
~ Leo Tolstoy, Anna Karenina
The Journey...U2 - Zoo Station..."Time is a train, makes the future the past..."
Makes the future the past
Leaves you standing in the station
Your face pressed up against the glass..."
"I'm ready
Ready for the laughing gas
I'm ready
Ready for what's next
Ready to duck
Ready to dive
Ready to say
I'm glad to be alive
I'm ready
Ready for the push
In the cool of the night
In the warmth of the breeze
I'll be crawling around
On my hands and knees..."
Evangelicals "Burning" Issues...
~ Jarrod McKenna from http://www.redletterchristians.org/love-wins-rob-bell-and-the-new-calvinists/
The Journey...U2 - Stay (Faraway, So Close!)...
Stay, and the day would keep its trust.
Stay, and the night would be enough..."
"Red lights, grey morning
You stumble out of a hole in the ground.
A vampire or a victim
It depends on who's around.
You used to stay in to watch the adverts
You could lip synch. to the talk shows.
And if you look, you look through me
And when you talk, you talk at me
And when I touch you, you don't feel a thing..."
Thursday, March 3, 2011
Wednesday, March 2, 2011
Tuesday, March 1, 2011
Love Wins: A Book About Heaven, Hell, and the Fate of Every Person Who Ever Lived by Rob Bell - Two Endorsements....
~ Greg Boyd, senior pastor at Woodland Hills Church and author of The Myth of a Christian Nation
“In the current religious climate in America, it isn’t easy to develop an imagination, a thoroughly biblical imagination, that takes in the comprehensive and eternal work of Christ in all people and all circumstances in love and for salvation. Rob Bell goes a long way in helping us acquire just such an imagination. Love Wins accomplishes this without a trace of soft sentimentality and without compromising an inch of evangelical conviction in its proclamation of the good news that is most truly for all.”
~ Eugene H. Peterson, Professor Emeritus of Spiritual Theology, Regent College, and author of The Message and The Pastor